“I LOVE getting an accountability email every morning. It makes such a big difference.”
Alcohol was disrupting my energy and confidence. It was consuming my thoughts. And spiritually, it was blurring my vision. I averaged 3-5 bottles of wine per week and tried MANY times to moderate, but I never once stuck to a plan. I knew 2020 had to be different. My goals were too big for hangovers.
What I thought was going to be a 28-day accountability group to follow through with “Dry January” ended up being a community to help me confront alcohol in my life. Two days into the challenge I decided to go for the entire year.
So far I have remained alcohol-free through vacation (my first sober vacation since I was 12 years old), celebrating our wedding anniversary, and through a global crisis. I just celebrated my highest sales month of my career as an entrepreneur. Best of all, I am fully present for my family.
Before finding OYNB
“How in the world do people survive toddlerhood without drinking?” I joked with my husband as I poured the remaining bottle of Barbera into our crystal glasses. The moment the sentence left my lips I felt uneasy. The real question was: Why couldn’t I get my drinking under control? I was the one with the problem. Not my booze-free friends. The truth was I envied them. I couldn’t comprehend life without alcohol and certainly not now with the challenges of motherhood.
Wine. I loved it a lot. So much so that one of the first words my baby daughter learned was “wine.” That was one of many warning signs that it had gone too far. I didn’t drink in high school because that’s what the “losers” did. I drank heavily one night per week in college that left me in a hungover stupor for class the next day. But I never missed a class. Even if I felt like puking on the dude in front of me. I wanted to be a success and only “losers” skipped class.
Due to becoming a major fitness nut, alcohol didn’t play a big role in my early 20s. But then I met my husband. He is well-travelled and had a much better budget to wine and dine. So that’s what we did. Up until we had Sofia, we ate and drank our way around the world. Literally. I couldn’t imagine traveling without alcohol involved.
…Couldn’t imagine dinners without wine.
…Meeting with friends without cocktails.
…A sunny fall day without an IPA.
…Birthdays without bubbly.
…The holidays without, well, all of it.
I tried cutting to twice per week. Only on the weekends. Set rules like not bringing alcohol into the home. Nothing was sustainable. All the emotions lead me to one conclusion: “Let’s drink!” Even if I was alone.
Starting my challenge
The New Year was upon us and like every other year I made a vow to do “Dry January” with zeal. Except, I always had to drink on New Year’s Day at the family gathering, and undoubtedly something in mid-late January would come up and I simply could not go without a bevvy for such an occasion. So, Dry January was usually more like, um, a dry two weeks. That’s good enough to prove I don’t have a problem, right?
I wanted this year to be different, so I signed up for a 28-day alcohol free challenge with OYNB. Members in the group immediately surrounded me with support and resources for success. I’ve made new friends and don’t feel alone in my journey. I LOVE getting an accountability email every morning. It makes such a big difference. I don’t think I could have made it this far without the support.
Thank you, OYNB!
An entrepreneur and former senior oil broker, Ruari gave up drinking after excessive consumption almost cost him his marriage, and worse, his life. Going alcohol-free improved his relationships, career and energy levels, leading to him founding OYNB to provide a support network for others.
